Hello Grandmother,

Fang has done a pretty good job carving out a position for himself as warlord of Los Angeles. He doesn’t rule the whole thing—Mother Superior still controls Orange County. The Hack has a good portion of the Valley under his sway. But Most of LA proper is Fang’s to lord over. So he’s none too pleased that the Ministries have sent the Bride of the Sword to micro-manage his operation.

Now, I’m just discovering this myself, but Fang isn’t actually a member of the Seven Deadly Ministries. He’s more like an affiliated feudal lord; paying tribute, but not involved structurally. Which has given him a lot of leeway to run his own faction for the last half decade. Now, he’s being told to stay quiet and follow orders. Not something he’s had a lot of experience doing. Rumors on the street are swirling that by the end of the week, there’s going to be a throwdown. I’m putting a lot of stock in their likely coming true. I can’t say when, but I’ll keep you updated as the death match draws closer.

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Hello Grandmother,

The leaders of the Vampire bureaucracy seem to have problems with how Fang is handling the situation in Los Angeles. And they don’t seem to thing that the Hack will be able to keep him in check (not that anyone thought he would). So they’re sending a new ambassador to the City of Angels, a warrior of renown who’s going to try to wrest control of the situation. This warrior is called the Bride of the Sword.

The Bride is a warrior from the crusades whose prowess in battle is considered unmatched. She was considered unnecessary by the vampire houses while the Illuminati ruled, which left her bitter and restless. Under the Blacksmith and the new vampire regime, she’s been considered the premiere enforcer. Now we’re going to find out if she can enforce the peace between the machines in the streets and the vampires in the penthouse.

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Hello Grandmother,

Fang hasn’t found his girlfriend. He hasn’t found Perdition. And that’s causing the LA streets to become more dangerous. The wolf packs aren’t finding the Infiltration agents they were hoping for. And rather than take this as a positive, they’re even becoming even more paranoid. The Knights of Day seem to be hindering their investigation, and that’s only raising the tension.

The robot population seems to be too scared to even flee the city, since there are now vampire’s forces watching the exits. I’m starting to wonder really if the Infiltration even exists beyond a few scattered machines. I’m waiting for something to blow this whole situation up, but so far it’s just been a collective uneasy. We’ll see if either side can back down before things become worse for everyone.

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Hello Grandmother,

I’m getting disturbing reports coming from inside the Ministries. Apparently paranoia levels are reaching epic heights in some places. While I don’t think that vampires in general are creatures I have sympathy for, the kinds of test that the Ministries seem to be running on anyone suspected of being a traitor seem cruel and perverse, even by vampire standards. I’ve heard stories of horrific mutilation, dumping in acid, severe mental torture, and loss of limbs. It’s hard not to rush to judgement on the Ministries and assume these stories are true. And it’s hard not to pity the same vampires who make up those Ministries who very well might soon be going through these very tortures.

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Hello Grandmother,

It’s long past time for me to begin your education. The vampires may run this world, and the robots may be tearing it down, but none of them can stop you from preparing yourself for when they come at you. You’re going to need to be ready, and it’s about time I began your training in how to defend yourself.

To begin with, I’m going to give you the best methods to take down a vampire. Most vampires use a type of sunscreen that allows them a limited mobility during the day, but most aren’t going to be wearing it at night. So UV rays and any kind of high intensity UV light are going to be your best bets.

Wooden stakes through the heart are another strong positive although this method has two real weaknesses: 1) It’s hard to find the heart if you’re not used to stake (I mean this, be careful if you’re trying to stake a vampire, if you miss the heart you’re just making them madder), and 2) not all vampires are going to go poof when you kill them. Certainly a dead vampire is better than one that wants to eat you, but if you happen upon a vampire that’s going to turn into a pile of goo, clean up can be a real pain. Also, staking will, you know, kill a human, and you don’t want to be going to jail for staking a person, that’s just not cool.

Holy water and crosses will work on most western vampires (though not all), and most vampires have an aversion to holy ground of any religion. Garlic is surprisingly helpful, though you will wind up smelling of it if you wear it too long. Silver and salt are weakness that generally applies only to vampires turned before the 1800’s, though you’re probably not going to have the time to ask a vampire it’s age if it’s trying to kill you. And it would probably lie anyways.

So there’s the basics. At some point, I want to cover the psychology of an attacking vampire, but I think I’ll save that for another class. For now, use this advice sparingly and wisely.

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Hello Grandmother,

The Cult of Lucifer has built themselves a zealotry that can last indefinitely. But they need a means to continue creating new members for their organization, and on that level, their existence is increasingly temporary. As much as the Seven Deadly Ministries seem to find a way to piss everyone off, going against the entire system of vampire management isn’t something that most undead people are likely to sign up for. Which makes the cult’s survival unlikely.

Which, I’m guessing, is the motivation behind their latest attacks, which have actually increased in size since the warehouse strikes over the weekend. A two Mini-Eyes higher officers were killed in a Ministry-controlled hotel tonight, with a message that amounts to a recruitment poster for the Cult left behind. It’s called Lucifer’s Pledge, and it’s a message, supposedly from the missing cult leader who all evidence show is deceased, in which he claims that he’s discovered the Ministry’s greatest secrets, and will reveal all once release from the prison they have kept him in. It’s not exactly the most believable sales pitch, but it’s sure to shake the enemy that already doesn’t trust itself.

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Hello Grandmother,

I’m starting to find receiving mail to be annoying. I didn’t get a lot of mail growing up, so I’m not exactly used to it. Flux had a letter delivered to me today. In it, the erstwhile robot claims to desperately want to get me my stuff back, but to be unable to due having to be on the move itself.

Apparently, the Illuminati Killer is chasing Flux, trying to re-obtain the mysterious Box that they had left me for safe keeping. This combined with the mercurial situation above ground has Flux racing through the catacombs underneath Los Angeles, which it claims go much deeper than anyone might imagine. All this means to me at the moment is that I’m not getting my stuff back. So I guess the lesson I have to learn here is that I can’t trust any old random robot I meet on the streets. As if that wasn’t what you taught me my entire childhood. Sigh.

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Hello Grandmother,

The Ministries seem to be having difficulties finding the members of cult of Lucifer. The cult members seem to have an easy time finding them, however. While the destruction they achieved last week doesn’t seem to be repeatable, there have already been two attempts by the cult to attack possible safe houses that may contain their missing lord Lucifer.

Which seems to be their main goal at the moment. The Cult itself may have dispersed, but the underground movement its trying to become has united around the goal of finding someone who all evidence supposes aught to be dead and gone. But that makes it all the more powerful. Because nothing engages a zealot like an unachievable goal, and hunting for their lost leader unites much better than waiting for him to come to them.

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Hello Grandmother,

I’m trying to define this “Mayor of Perdition”. The rumors are swirling swiftly, and it’s hard to pin down any actual facts. A lot of reports depict the mayor as excessively standard, typifying the Infiltrations desires to appear as normal as possible. Other portray the Mayor as taking a hyper-sexualized form, in some stories male and some stories female, who uses guile and manipulation in every encounter. Still others depict the mayor as not having a human form at all, instead it’s a consciousness that controls every inch of the city of Perdition.

The Infiltration’s greatest success has been inspiring the imagination of the creatures of night in coming up with new fears. And they are most definitely afraid. The last few days in LA have been tense. There is practically a vampire curfew, with few of anything mystical seen at night. But is this fear going anywhere? Are they going to find the Infiltrators? Or do they need to get their act together and solve the problem intellectually? That certainly seems like it would be a nice change of pace here.

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Hello Grandmother,

Flux has gone back into hiding. Which means I’m probably never going to get my stuff back. I don’t know if I was happier when it was trying to manipulate me, but I can’t say it’s disappearance doesn’t worry me. Because it’s a dangerous robot, and I know it’s planning something.

I have to wonder, is it doing something with the Box? That strange Aztec MP3 player that was delivered to me by the “real” Illuminati killer. Has it been able to unlock the devices secrets? I’m frustratingly curious. And I’m al little curious what said killer has really been up to with Kelly Burke being executed for their crime. As much as the bigger conflicts between the Ministries and the Infiltration scare the crap out of me, it’s these smaller mysteries that truly terrify me.

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